Dear Little Girl,
It’s a big, big world out there, and as you grow up you will see more of it. It’s a shame that we can’t all stay so innocent and pure forever. But don’t be afraid. Big doesn’t just have to be scary, it can be beautiful too..
Little Girl, why are you crying? Dry those eyes.. your tears are precious, are they really worth it right now? You are a tough girl, I’m sure of it. Fight those tears.. for me?
I have been in this world for a fair few years now, and I think that I might have some lessons for you. Lessons to prepare you for coming into this big world. I want you to take them from these mistakes that I’ve made in my own life, so don’t make the same ones now if you can, okay?
Firstly, you are so smart! You have no idea how smart you are, but you should know this now! I had a hard time in school for not being smart, for not knowing everything, I let it get me down so bad.. but you know what? There are different kinds of smart! You don’t even have to be able to read or write to be smart. There will be something that you are great at, and don’t feel bad if you can’t find it right away, it’s there somewhere, okay? Believe in yourself.
Little Girl, this is my next lesson for you.. As you grow up, you will also realise that the world, and many people in it, have certain expectations of you, certain standards that they expect you to live by.. Fuck it! It’s all completely wrong. You wanna be gay? Be gay! You wanna wear that? Wear it proud! You’re not skinny? Who cares.. Maybe women have it a little tougher growing up than men, but I’m not sure about this. We are meant to look a certain way, act a certain way, we must not speak out of place, we are to be shy and sweet. Men are the dominant, the rulers, the breadwinners, they are the stronger sex, the powerful ones. Women are weaker, we are child-bearers, we need a man to provide for us, to tell us what to do - or so they think… Let me tell you this now, you don’t need a man to rule you! You wanna be powerful, dominant? You absolutely can! Fuck these idealisations that men rule the world.. YOU rule your OWN world!
"You’re a slave to money then you die." I really hate this one, Little Girl. From what I’ve been able to tell, this is absolutely true for this world. I wish with all my heart that it wasn’t. You don’t need to be rich to be happy, I don’t mean that at all.. But you need to make sure you can make enough money to get by, and to treat yourself also! So you get a good job okay? Stay in school! It feels like it lasts forever, believe me, I know this, but it’s not true at all. You hang in there okay? If at some point you find something that you know in your heart you want to do, don’t you let anything stop you! Be what you want, as well as who you want, and be proud! Spend your money wisely, don’t be careless like I was, but its okay, we all make mistakes. Just do your best.
Mental Illness. I could give you all the cuddles and kisses in the world, Little Girl, I would wrap you up in a bubble and save you from everything and anything bad, but that won’t help you.. I believe that there are many more people who are victim to mental health problems than we know about. It’s a terrifying thing for anyone to go through, and maybe at some point you might fall victim to it too.. Little Girl, I want to take all the pain that you might get from this world and hold it in my heart so that you never have to know it, but I can’t do that.. But I believe that you will be strong enough to deal with it. If you come across someone who acts a certain way, if there is one lesson that you take from me, please know that everyone has a past. People attention seek, people are rude and hurtful, they are nasty.. they are troubled. Little Girl, they are just hurting.. Please do not judge them too harshly. Another great lesson that I learnt was that you could be going through the exact same troubles as another person and you both will still cope with it very differently. Some people can’t cope with things well, even small things.. and it might make them angry, bitter.. they might take it out on you, but don’t take it personally, okay? It’s not your fault. To sit here and learn about all the different mental health conditions or whatever, it would take a long time.. But you don’t need to do that, you just need to do this one thing - if you can’t understand, just accept, and whatever you do, don’t become ignorant, that’s not who you are. You have a big heart, Little Girl, love people with all of it. Is someone sad around you right now? Are they stressed? Make them smile please! It can be as simple as just smiling at them as you pass them by.. Someone can see a million faces in a day, but its the ones that are smiling that they notice and remember! They will appreciate you for it. Making people happy is a great thing, and its so nice to be there for other people, but don’t take on too much okay? Don’t neglect yourself while you are busy caring for others. Just you don’t need make the world a tougher place for others who have to live here in this world too, regardless of their race, religion, sex or sexuality. Don’t discriminate. You have a pure heart, don’t hold any hate in there, or it will destroy it. If someone hurts you, Little Girl, stand up for yourself by all means! Never let someone bring you down, but don’t be so quick to become offended by other peoples hurtful words either. Shake it off and forget about it, you can do it.
I left this subject for last, Little Girl, and I am truly sorry that this can’t be better advice for you. Despite everything you may own right now, there is only one thing that you have that is absolutely yours. Your heart. It needs to be shared with someone who can look after it properly. You have a great heart, do you understand? When its time to give it to someone, they have to be absolutely worth it. I don’t want to be talking with you about relationships, but I guess that I have to, they will be a big part in your life, I would know.. this is the one part where I’ve made the biggest mistakes. I want you to try not to make them too, okay? Before you can love another man, (or a woman, either is completely fine!) you must first learn to love yourself. I can’t stress this enough for you.. Don’t try and be “perfect” because it doesn’t exist. Be the person that you are and be it 100% and when the time comes, someone will love you for you. Many people may try and steal your heart, Little Girl, just so they can break it. Don’t you dare let them. Most likely, they have had the same thing happen to themselves too.
Little Girl, I’m not sure what to say to you.. I was always one for searching for acceptance in other people, making them happy, because I couldn’t find the acceptance and happiness in myself. Don’t you do that too, okay? If someone has to make you question something about yourself, get rid of them! They are no good for you. You will meet some great people in your life, but if you meet the bad ones first, don’t let how they’ve treated you affect how you treat the good people. Sure you may fight sometimes, you may argue, you may drift apart, but there’s no need to be nasty. True friendships last a lifetime, no matter what.
I’m not sure what else there is for me to tell you right now, I’m just 24 and I’m still finding out things about this world myself every day. I just wanted to share the lessons with you that I have learnt so far, I hope that they have helped? You are not alone, Little Girl, I am here in the dark with you when you are crying, I am holding your hand as you take your biggest steps in life, and I am behind you pushing you when it feels like all motivation has passed you by. You can’t see me, but I am there with you, always. You are never alone. Live, laugh and love (sensibly!) I’ll close with two of my favourite quotes, and these are important so remember them, okay?
"It gets better, it always gets better.. Life will never put you through anything more than you can handle."
"Everything is okay in the end, and if its not okay, it’s not the end!"
Believe me with these, Little Girl, they are very true. Prepare yourself for the big world, learn that it can be a great world despite how badly you might see it right now. But most importantly, make it your own world! I will love you always.
Stay Strong ♥